It was 2am in the
morning after 20 hours of riding as we continued to climb up and over 500
metres in elevation through the Northern Pennines, England. The rain was still lashing
down and had been all night soaking every layer of clothing I had on. With every
metre climbed it was getting colder, and the visibility was getting worst. We were
haemorrhaging time, my brakes were starting to fail after the steepest descents
I’ve ever ridden, and my front light kept going into auto-flash mode as we
descended at speeds over 25mph on wet dark roads. Just another typical Saturday
night on an Audax ride then ;-) .... whilst
the rest of the country are tucked up inside probably watching a dancing talking
dog.
This particular Audax was the Pendle 600. It was one I had chosen to do as a ‘bit of fun’ following my successful 600K PBP qualifier in the Windsor-Chester-Windsor ride two weeks prior. But this stopped being fun hours ago. It was fun when I rode into Robin Hood Bay on the East Coast of England in the warm afternoon sun and enjoyed fish & chips overlooking the Bay. Back then I had a warm glow of satisfaction as I breezed through the first 200K feeling great about the ride and how well I was progressing but this was now just a memory, replaced with something a lot darker.
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| Robin Hood's Bay (170K) |
We had ridden swiftly through the Yorkshire Dales, conquered
the mighty North York Moors but were being slowly beaten into submission by the
constant and never-ending climbs of the Pennines. And we still had the rest of
the night to endure and then a full circle of the Lake District the following
day. The route was 616 km with over 10,000 metres (30,000ft) of climbing,
passing through 5 counties, 3 National Parks and visiting both the east and
west coast of England. I was starting for the first time to think that I had
taken on more than I or the ElliptiGO could handle.
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| Pendle 600 route and profile (complete with 'mood' smileys!) |
As dawn broke and the rain continued to fall we (I was riding
with two cyclists - Chris and Glenn through the night) had almost completed
400k. We were soon to be arriving at the ‘night’ control where we would get
some much needed rest and recovery to take on the final 200K in the Lakes. But
night had now been replaced with day and the 2.5hr time cushion I’d built up during
the first 12 hours of the ride was now all but gone so there was no chance to
sleep. I was therefore looking at a continuous 40 hour ride if I was to finish.
Oh joy why do I do this to myself.
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| Typical warning signs of ridiculously steep descent ahead |
As Glenn and I descended the long mountain pass to finally exit
the Pennines my brake situation was now critical. We wound our way down in the
rain and as I took one sweeping right hander I discovered I had no stopping
power at all! They’d taken a pounding over the last 24 hours of steep descents
and were worn down to the metal. I almost lost the back end of the ElliptiGO as
it fish-tailed out of the bend but just about held onto the slick road surface.
I simply couldn’t descend another metre in this state. Glenn went on ahead at
my say so (time was far too precious to hang around) and I stopped to assess
the situation. For the first time in 4 years of riding I’d actually brought
with me a set of new brake blocks. All I had to do now was fit them in the
pouring rain half way down a mountain with my snowboard gloves on. This wasn’t going
to be a quick job. It ended up taking at least 20 minutes (maybe even 30) to
get them fitted. I opted for replacing the front brakes which were both easier
to change, and also provide more control over braking.
I rolled into the only manned control point on the entire
ride wanting only to stop and not carry on. I’d covered the hardest 400K I’ve
ever ridden in a time of 24 hours. I was soaked through, cold, only had a front
brake, and the thought of going back out for another hard 200k unsurprisingly did
not appeal. I had nothing to prove, I could call it a solid training ride and jump
on the train and head back. But it’s amazing what the surroundings of a warm village
hall will make you do. There were a few folk still here with some just heading
off having enjoyed the luxury of sleep, but most riders had been and gone. I
was (almost) last at this point simply due to the fact that cycles are inherently
faster than an ElliptiGO (no matter how big the engine.
I spent over an hour getting my head together, taking my
time, refuelling with jam on toast (heaven) and changing into a complete dry
set of clothes. For once I had packed my drop bag with precision and got it
spot on - even down to the 4th pair of gloves that I packed just in
case. The other 3 pairs including my ‘Waterproof’ sealskinz were soaked through
so this was that ‘just in case’ moment. Putting on those dry clothes was
(almost) like starting the ride afresh, and as I left the control I was feeling
quite positive again and felt like the worst of this ride was now behind me.
However I was heading for the Lake District with all those miles and climbs in
my legs and was now ½ hour over the event cut-off time. Failing to finish this
Audax hadn’t really crossed my mind until now, but I knew this ride would push
me to my limits and it was proving to be the case.
I won’t continue with a blow by blow account of day 2. The
route picked up where it left off and included a not so enjoyable stretch of an
extremely busy Dual Carriageway into the Lake District which I was not
expecting. Then it was into the ups and downs of the Lakes. One climb after
another after another with many (as they’d been throughout the ride) commonly over
20% gradient climbs. These were obviously slow GOing but on the bright side the
rain had stopped and the sun was shining.
The Lakes really tested my only working brake with the rear
totally out of action. It squeaked like hell on the descents which only added
to the surprise I guess when by-standers saw what I was riding. I battled on
and eventually made it to Seascale on the west coast 45 minutes inside the
cut-off. I’d somehow made back some time, but this time would all but be lost
waiting for my food to arrive at the seafront café. To be honest I didn’t care.
I’d ridden for over 30 hours now so stopping was a pleasure and I didn’t stress
about the time lost. In hindsight it was this lengthy stop that actually cost
me the successful completion of this ride. But there were other lengthy stops
all the way along this ride including a late night pizza, plus the 30 min brake
repair which all cost time. So it really doesn’t come down to any one particular
stop but the combination of them all which added up to a non-moving time of
over 6 hours.
Between Seascale and the next control at Carnforth they’d saved
the biggest (steepest) climbs of all. Hardknott Pass in the Lakes kicks up at
over 30% (1 in 3) and even sees cars struggle. As I approached and looked up I
knew straight away that I’d be walking a fair amount of this climb, and that a
hairy descent awaiting on the other side followed by a second climb and another
steep descent. Even walking and pushing the 20+KG ElliptiGO up this climb was a
struggle and very time consuming. Time I simply didn’t have at this stage.
Eventually I made it up and over both climbs and could enjoy (read: endure) the remaining stage that flattened
out and hugged Lake Windermere all the way south to Carnforth.
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| Strategically located telephone box at the bottom of Hardknott Pass! **** come pick me up! |
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| Hardknott Pass |
At Carnforth (565K) my ride came to an end. I missed the cut-off
by around 20 minutes so I wouldn’t be listed as an official finisher of the
Audax but I could still have continued and completed the full distance. But I
simply didn’t want to go on. And so this is where I really need to understand
what changed in my head from leaving Seascale to arriving at Carnforth that
made me SO intent on stopping. Physically I was more than capable of riding the
remaining 55K to the finish. Mentally however I was done. I convinced myself that
there was no real value in continuing the ride, and playing on my mind was the
fact that it would mean riding into a second night, with more big climbs and
descents to come ridden in the dark with only a front brake. I was last and had
no company. I had no one to share what would have been an amazing finish. And
with that and the relative warmth of the Truck Haven garage that was it. I feel
crap now that of course I didn’t continue. I feel that this is the same mental
weakness that I led me to pull out of a 100 mile ultra-run in 2012 simply
because I didn’t want to continue.
And I now can connect the reason why it happened then, and
why it happened again now. And it’s very simple. In the emotional turmoil of
the situation and the desire to stop it totally clouds your thinking and any
rational thought as to why you are out there doing what you are doing. Critically
you forget your goals because your mind is very powerful and wants you to stop.
My goals for this ride were very simple (and I even wrote them down in an email
to a friend before the event). Plan A was to finish under the cut off and ride
every climb. Plan B was to finish under the cut off. Plan C was to simply
finish the event (over the cut off). I’d forgotten Plan C. I allowed myself to
reset those goals and convince myself that 565K was a good (2) day’s work which
I could be happy with. And now I’m kicking myself for not continuing even
though at the time I was convinced it was the right decision.
So there we go…. My first Audax DNF. I don’t honestly know
how I feel about it. Gutted of course that I didn’t prove the ElliptiGO could finish
the Pendle 600 in under the cut-off because I truly believed I would, and still
can. 6 hours was too much time to waste on terrain this tough, and I estimate I
only needed 1 hour over the cut-off to complete this ride this time around. So I’m
not finished with the Pendle 600. I’m quite certain now that I’ll be back to
complete this ride. And with the modifications that I’m in the middle of
sorting out on my ElliptiGO that involves the braking system, plus sorting out
lower gearing for an event like this, I know that next time the ElliptiGO (and
I) will be far better equipped to deal with the relentless terrain.
Windsor-Chester-Windsor 600K Audax
Very very briefly the WCW was my final qualifying ride for PBP which I rode two weeks prior to Pendle. WCW went very well (almost like clockwork). I rode at a pre-determined pace of 21kph for as long as I could sustain with fellow ElliptiGO rider Billy. We built up enough time to stop for 4 hours at the night control and slept for 3 of those hours. Quite in contrast to Pendle! I finished the ride in 38.5 hours and have officially qualified for PBP having ridden a SR series (200/300/400/600).
